Secrets of Recovering After a Loss of a Loved One

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“Now it is a custom to be fenced from the plants by stone walls as if we do not have anything in common with them. It is not enough to simply plant a flower in your house – in this case, it will feel itself a prisoner. It needs to be precisely invited.” 

Introduction

Old P. was rather proud, but good-natured. A man of short stature, he had a face of brick red color and excessively mobile. He gave an impression of being clumsy with bowed legs and a very large head and arms. His whole frame denoted exceptional strength. He was known to be over 50 at the time but no one would ever guess right his exact age as his extraordinary keen eyes were young and his ever-smiling mouth of perfect shape and fullness any woman would kill for, stretched from ear to ear showing those dazzlingly white teeth that only a much younger person could have. The physiognomy of this individual was fascinating, and I often found myself mesmerized by his countenance. I always was a creature of intense observation. That peculiar characteristic of mine made people think of me as a thoughtful and aloof child when I was simply surveying the surface of every peculiar face. 

The old man kept himself to himself, and away from everybody since the force of nature deprived him of family happiness. When the fire started the whole village gathered to help the unfortunate fellows with every possible aid before the fire department car arrived. That was the year my mom was pregnant with my older sister, so I know about the event only from the words of witnesses. 

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My supplication for the life and healing of the gentle broken soul, who is tottering on the deep grave’s verge of his beloved people, is in heartfelt prayer. Those who have lived but no longer with us implore you to step on a road of recovery. You need to continue living under the united care of the love remembered and the love still felt. The marks of grief and regret awaken the health-diminishing powers within. You need to learn contentedness again, even if more from good-mother-nature than from people. 

Simple Life Firmly Impresses True Values Upon Your Memory

P.’s family lived in one of four identical solid wood houses built close to each other for collective farm workers right near the wheat field about a mile from the rest of the villagers. Beautiful flower beds in front of it and a neat looking vegetable garden behind were the objects of envy and admiration of all women of the neighborhood. My mother said that it was from A. she learned to hang linen in a ‘right’ way, placing it on a rope grouped by the size and color. 

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Delicious memories are made not from riches but from sincere devotion and care of the loving people. Light heart and bright visions thrive in an atmosphere of slight monetary tightness if the right person is beside. The wrong one will turn tail and dart off at full speed in this case. If you find each other at the humble beginning of your lives, your union will give you the longest bliss in any future life developments. 

Family Devotion in the Sacred Impulses of Your Soul

This family was an example of true devotion and love that does not consider poverty a misfortune rather a way to be inventive. P. made the best toys out of anything that he could find close to his skilled hands: a piece of wood or a branch from a tree, a chunk of plastic someone tossed away a paper box, the list can be endless. He made a wooden doll for my sister and presented it dressed in the cutest outfit his wife made from various pieces of cloth when she came to visit my mom one day. I still have that doll, the dress she wears now is knitted by my mother’s loving hand and the ugly-looking shoes and hat is a result of my experimentations with threat and a hook.

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Stripped of all unimportant, your life holds only onto family values. As confused as our existence can be sometimes, only family gives you the heart to cope with all difficulties. The power of it, so long proved, is gaining in strength with passing time and experienced together challenges. No slight thing will be able to disturb the equanimity of your mind if you have the support of the loving people.

The Vastness of Nature Saves the Broken Souls

P. was a forester, the occupation that barely was sufficient to provide for the family but which he would never change for a more highly paid a combine or a tractor driver one. He was on his duty going around the encampment spots and making sure no one was abusing the unfortunate forest for its wood when the sound of fire alarm brought him home. The unusually hot summer weather in July 1983 endangered not only forests but all the grass fields of the area. The windy weather made the progress of the wildfire rapid and valiant. The woman and the infant were sound asleep and hopefully never sensed the pain of a horrible death. 

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The mist rolling along the ground can serve as a healing bandage for a suffering soul. The wealth of nature is the poetry of life, how happiness can exist without that wealth? The power of a stunning scene overwhelms the senses and leaves less space for remorse. Nature takes no notice of you, and even less of your worries – and that is one of the main healing properties of it. You feel much more the better if realization of your unimportance in the face of nature vastness enters your mind. If you feel yourself a mere small part of the universe, your loss feels less devastating.

Coping With a Loss Through the Fervency of All the Loving

P. didn’t cry, only kept on working until exhaustion froze his mind and the physical pain from the burned skin numbed his feelings. The memorial service for three victims of the fire was performed on the same day. He became a frequent visitor to the village church and talked a lot with our priest after every Sunday mass. He built a neat but much smaller house in the place of a conflagration and started a life of reclusion. Over time, he renewed communication, stopping now and then to talk to an old acquaintance, sometimes presenting a new handmade toy car to a boy or a lovely rag doll to a girl.

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Support from caring people puts the heart in you. Welcome it and let the compassion do its healing deed. Kind communication can draw a smile from you in the gloomiest time of your life. And a smile helps to recover your will-power. Every trace of positivity is much needed at the time of inner struggle. To be with a loving person has something of the divine in it.

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Conclusion

“Now it is a custom to be fenced from the plants by stone walls as if we do not have anything in common with them. It is not enough to simply plant a flower in your house – in this case it will feel itself a prisoner. It needs to be precisely invited.” 

I believe those were the highest number of words old quiet P. said to anybody. He found me struggling with some kind of weed looking plant and sat on bare soil beside. It was so awesome to see him sitting on plane earth. I mean, it was normal for a kid to ignore the caution from adults to put something under your little butt, but for an old wise man to do so seemed the coolest thing for a 5-year-old me. He was naturally taciturn. After the tragic death of his wife and a baby daughter, it was easier to get a full version of a Bollywood movie out of his expressive face than speech out of his lips. 

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Material advantages of fortune are lost amid the true treasures of sincere affection. Loving people can lend fresh vigor to your life. The luster of the loving eyes, the brightness of the sincere smile, the beaming of the compassionate soul whisper of beauty beyond the tomb.

The people who have the vastness of nature to lose themselves in can manage to recover their balance. Call up before your mind’s eyes the greenery and fragrance of the fields and a dusky curtain of grief will be lifted inch by inch. 

Stay tuned…

24 COMMENTS

  1. Everyone has their own way of dealing with the loss of a loved one. Some suffer in silence, some seek the comfort of others, some never recover.

  2. Great way of recovering on this kind of disorder, totally agree with everything I’ve read here. This is definitely a great help dealing on this kind of condition. Thanks for sharing.

  3. What a heart warming story, life is a series of events that shape and mold us. Thank you for sharing this story, can’t wait to read more.

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